CORPORAL PUNISHMENT

We hear much on this subject from social scientists, who would generally have us believe that it is the source of most spouse abuse and the other ills of our violent society.

Recently a parent in a grocery store was accused of assault of their child for what would normally considered routine discipline.

On a recent PBS radio interview I heard a social scientist state that when children are accustomed to being controlled by violence, it is only reasonable to expect that they themselves will find it "impossible to spare the rod" when they get older.

This is an appealing intuitive solution. Its only problem is that it is dead wrong! It was tried by the followers of Dr. Spock in the 50's and 60's, and we are now reaping the its harvest, which is more, not less, violence.

However, like most things with great intuitive appeal, there is an element of truth in this "hands-off" doctrine which we dare not ignore.

All bible-believing people know God's word clearly teaches that the chastisement of the rod is a condition of love: "He that spareth his rod hateth his son; but he that loveth him chasteneth him diligently" (Prov. 13: 24). See also Prov. 15: 23; 23: 13-14; 29: 15-17.

But we have all seen people who beat their kids silly, and they still do not seem to be able to control them; so we know that the child's behavior does not depend upon the parent's brutality. So what is the answer?

First, the nature of the rod, or switch, is that it stings and causes temporary discomfort, but it does not bruise muscle or bone, which is typical of child abuse. There is absolutely no authority for such abuse in God's word. Parents who so injure their children contrary to God's word are planting the seeds which will grow into worse abuse of their grandchildren.

Second, the rod must be administered consistently. This will not be done if it is only administered when dad or mom get mad. Consistency requires that we react to the infraction, not our own emotions. If you can't get yourself under control, don't expect to control your kids!

Third, it should only be a last resort. There are many ways that parents can administer rewards and punishments. Indeed, positive reinforcement for good behavior is as essential to balanced nurturing as is punishment. See Eph. 6: 4.

"Behavior which is rewarded will tend to be repeated; behavior which is punished will tend to be abandoned."

It takes a great deal of wisdom for parents to administer rewards and punishments, and to know how to increase freedom as children age. But the source of this wisdom is the word of God, and the essential word of Prov. 13: 24 provides the key to exercising that wisdom: love.

\