RELATIONSHIPS

Before I finish the wonderful book, "The Familiar Stranger," I've been reading and put it back up on the shelf, I want to quote a few more things from Tyler Staton about relationships and make some personal comments.

Staton says, "Do you want the power of the Spirit? Listen to one another. Ask good, thoughtful questions, and then really listen. Be patient with one another. Have time for each other. Invite someone else in. Discomfort yourself to expand your friend group, to share your lunch plans, to open up your home."

I love his phrase, "Discomfort yourself to expand your friend group."

I truly believe God has done more in my life over the past five years than in the previous sixty. Two things have made all the difference: first, the private time I’ve intentionally spent with Him; and second, the new people I’ve welcomed into my circle. Previously, I guarded my private time. When God began a deeper work in me, He prompted me to open myself up to personally minister to a wider variety of people and, also, to be ministered to by a wider variety of people.

I joined a Life Group, a.k.a. Sunday School Class (I hadn't attended a one in years. I only went to "big" church). I joined a small group within my Life Group. (I actually go to the fellowships and talk with all the people instead of huddling up in the corner with one or two). Then, I joined a Women's Bible Study and became active in the small group that meets before the large group (I had never done that before; I wouldn't miss it now). I sit at a round table every Wednesday night with a group of Senior Saints for fellowship supper and enjoy regular times of potluck dinners with these same friends in a home setting. (People who knew me "before" have a hard time believing I do this. I love these people). I hang out at the coffee station on Sunday mornings and chat with anyone who happens by. (I used to hide out instead of hang out). I'm a member of a Book Club. (I know, it's hard to believe). I have a large and very diverse group of people the Holy Spirit is adding to my life everywhere I go who pray for and give me wisdom in the Think On These Things Ministry. (Each one of them brings something to the table that God knows I need. They are my inner circle.) Now, instead of getting my feelings hurt thinking I've been left out, I invite ladies to lunch, into my home, or to sit and rock with me on my front porch. (I now initiate). I talk to strangers everywhere I go and share the gospel regularly. (Only the transforming Spirit of God could have done this in my life.)

What I'm saying is that I used to be so self-protected that it was impossible to get on the inside unless you were a very, very small handful of people I considered to be "safe." I now love people. All kinds of people. I look for them, instead of hide from them. Only God could have done that in me! God has shown me that it doesn't do one bit of good for Him to pour into me if I don't have relationships to pour it back out. If I didn't have these people, I would become like the Dead Sea.

Let me share one last paragraph out of Tyler Staton's book: "Life is about relationships. On your deathbed, you will not be thinking about accomplishments or failures, what you got done or left undone. You will not be proudly or shamefully scanning your resume or bank account. You will not be crossing off your to-do list. When the lights are going out on your numbered days this side of eternity, you will not be thinking about whatever's stressing you today. You'll be thinking about people. The people you got to spend your life with. How you loved them or didn't. How you prioritized them or didn't. What you sacrificed to know them more deeply or what got in the way."

I (Gayle) want to tell you that I believe in to-do lists, but the most important thing on your to-do list should be people, not tasks. Don't wait to be asked, initiate. If God puts someone on your heart, there is a reason. If God puts someone in your life, they are a priceless gift from Him whom you need to steward well.

Are you connected? I used to be connected to one or two people whom I sucked the life out of. I was swimming in a thimble when there was an ocean out there. I'm now spreading the joy and, in return, am being filled by them with more joy than I could have ever imagined.

Go find your people. There are people who need you and people you need. On your mark, get set, ready, go!